I thought I had found some weakening of your position when I read the first sentence of this paragraph:- "Likewise, if society intends to make divorce law center around the children's needs - a worthy goal - and yet we only make things worse for the children,............."
But then you went on to say this:-..."the answer is to find a way to better serve the needs of children of divorce. The WRONG answer is to proclaim that we should disregard the children's interests in divorce and then somehow hope that will improve things for kids."
And then this:-
"The right question is: "Are we really doing what is best for children and, if not, what can we do better?" The wrong answer is: "Let's stop trying to do what is best for the kids."
So long as you hold the belief that the authorities:-
1. May always know what is best for anyone's children after divorce.
2. Must always have the power to intervene and declare one or other parent not in the child's best interests.
Then the two of us are at opposite ends of this arguments over BIC and can never meet.
I do say this though, that given the sophistication of society today, the technology especially in communications, whatever changes are made to family law, that are likely to be made, aren't going to be simple steps.
We live in a world where one parent might be able to have a camera or communication device implanted somewhere, so that they can monitor the child's contact with the other parent completely.
There will be no getting away from these control freak parents soon, if they wish to pursue such a course of action. Maybe both parents will indulge in similar behaviour so that they can watch their child (all in their "best interests" of course) 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
You may feel I'm jesting, but why not?
My last point is an old chestnut between us, and it is that to read your posts you would think that no other country who has refused to accept BIC paramountcy or any other period in history for our own countries, where contact decisions were made on the basis of other principles, have any merit whatsoever.
I am glad we have gone through all these arguments and yet feel our lack of agreement is something to be dispirited about. The same hiatus will exist when others try to examine all these matters and progress will be hampered by it all again.
All the best, Graham