I always loved the Cathy cartoon, with the bossy no it young kid trying to tell them mom with the screaming child how to parent and the mom saying "yeah I used to judmental before I had kids too"
Until you have lived some of these things it is easy to be judgemental to "know" whats wrong. my husband is a saint, if my kids treated and did some of the things his have done to him, I would have said to hell with you long ago.