Posted by:

CD

on August 26, 2007 at 10:43:14:

if you adopt the baby, it's yours. If you don't adopt, it's not yours. Of course, adoption is not necessarily an easy process, and you will have to go through the "system" to do it, but that's what I'm hearing from your words. Note: it probably isn't enough that you and the other mom agree. Baby #5's father will most likely have to be involved in the decision. If you attempt to circumvent that, it could bite you in the tail a bit down the road. It also depends on the laws for adoption in your state, which you can find in our links section (click links at left, then Regional at right, then choose your state or country, then click on the family code link in your state - that should get you started).

If you don't want to adopt, then you may still be able to take care of the child informally, much as a babysitter would. You would be a glorified babysitter, but you would never have any legal standing (except under extremely unusual circumstances). And again, what about dad? Would he agree to this long-term arrangement?

So you probably need to do a little research, and start talking to the attorneys in your area using words they understand, and words that indicate to them you also understand what you want, and how to get it. Then, let the attorneys do the paperwork, otherwise you could really screw it up, it's that easy to screw up legal paperwork, if you don't know how to do it.

This is not legal advise. I have merely offered suggestions to focus your thoughts. I strongly recommend you contact a very knowledgeable attorney in your area for further advise.

Good Luck.

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